“Look was a way to tell you that you’re my daughter,” (Piyathida Nakheefai).“Look,” was a Thai word that meant daughter or son and parents in Thailand would refer their children with this word and the same went with my Mom. As a young child, I knew that this word meant more than just daughter but, it had a stronger, deeper meaning. Whenever, my mom ;said the word “Look” I knew it was a way to show affection and to this day this word still follows me.





Out of all the other nicknames my family and I share the one that holds the most meaning to me is the word look. Although, this word is widely used in Thailand to show affection for their children, I still believe that this word is unique to my Mom and I. As an infant, I remember clearly my Mom would always call me look with a smile and I think those were my most carefree days. That’s because, during the time whenever she used that word it was always for something good and I think that’s why whenever I reminisce on when I was called by look I always end up with a grin. Furthermore, it is only something that my Mom and I share not even my sister gets called by it. That’s because, in my family I am the one that she raised herself and alongside my Father except my sister because, she was mostly raised by nannies. I strongly believe, that this word my Mom and I share proofs of the special bond.





Not only does the word hold meaning to me but, to my Mom. The word to her was a way to instill a piece of Thailand in me. She wasn’t able to express her love in English so the word look sufficed for her and I. “Look, well you are my daughter so I called you that,” my mom said to me. It was just that the word was a way to tell me I was her daughter is why it is so important to her. Also, during the time she used that name for me it was when I was little and always in her arms. So, along with giving me reassurance that I was her daughter it also gave her memories. To illustrate, during the time she called my by this name it was when I was a toddler and was always in her arms. Whenever, she talks about the past, there was always a smile on her face and I knew this word was more than just look.





This word is also a way to immerse myself in my Thai roots. Since, I was raised in America I didn’t know much Thai customs because, my family was merging with the American culture. So, I was labelled as “falang” which means foreigner in Thai because I was unaware of my Thai roots. However, as I grew up and learned more about my native culture the word look was a word that made me aware I was Thai. That’s because, in other families the nicknames for their children would be whatever was meaningful in their family but, in my family it was a way to become familiar with my background whilst showing affection towards me.




Although, my Mom doesn’t use this nickname as often now it will always hold meaning to me. That’s because, this word has in a way nurtured me to the person I am today. I believe, if this word wasn’t around I wouldn’t be as such a nice person as I am today. Since, my Mom would always say this meaning with love, I’d like to think the love was absorbed into me and that’s why I’m not a bitter person. Furthermore, this word has a lot of meaningful memories that always manages to bring a smile upon my face. For example, in the rare occasions my Mom does say the word I always reminisce on memories of younger me running into her arms for food. The word look, will always be a word of memories and in a way something that has shaped me into the person I am today.